Cooking With Lard

I notice these things.

I was watching Infowars live broascast yesterday, and they were showing a spoof  black-and-white Twilight Zone that they’d put together. Compere Owen Shroyer played a big role in it. He seems to be quite a good actor.

I was only half-watching it when he suddenly did something very surprising.

He lit a cigarette.

It took me a few seconds to take in the enormity of it, and I only just managed to use Windows’ Snipping Tool in time to capture the event.

Yes, that’s a cigarette between his fingers. And that’s smoke that’s rising from it.

Lighting a cigarette on air these days is equivalent to dropping your pants and waving your free end around. Only it’s much, much worse than doing anything as innocuous as that.

I’ve already got Infowars compere Paul Joseph Watson down as a likely smoker. Now it looks like Owen Shroyer is another one.

Perhaps they all are. Including Alex Jones himself.

If so, the most subversive thing they could possibly do (subversive of Political Correctness, that is) would be for them to all light up on the live show one day.

Hat tip to Roobee for the following video clip. Seems the puritans want to ban darts competition walk-on girls next.

Puritan Sally Howard said it was “demeaning”, and wanted Formula One grid girls banned as well. It was, she said, “a social change that we’re seeing.” She also mentioned in passing that she was a “feminist.” The walk-on girls played a “decorative role” and were “making money for men.” She also said that there was a “92% gender pay gap” in the darts world. She also said that “kiss-me-quick, carry-on English culture” was “outdated”, adding that “We don’t cook with lard.”

Funnily enough, I was cooking with lard just yesterday. It’s something I’ve started doing in recent years, a bit like cooking lamb chops or pork chops, or English breakfasts, or making toast and marmalade.

The entire thrust of the puritan’s argument seemed to be that this was “necessary” social change for “outdated” English culture. I couldn’t help but think that once she’d got the walk-on girls and grid girls banned she’d be lobbying for modelling to be banned as well. After all, don’t models play a “decorative role” in fashion. For isn’t that just as “demeaning”. Goodbye Vogue, Elle, Marie Claire. And if you want to ban things because they’re “outdated”, you’ll stop at nothing to demolish an entire traditional culture. You’d ban darts and football and Formula One. And you’d demolish every single building in England, because they’re all “outdated” more or less as soon as they’re erected. Some of them are hundreds of years old. How “outdated” can you get than the Tower of London or Westminster Abbey?

The “outdated” argument is entirely empty of any substance. It’s actually completely meaningless. What does it mean to say something is outdated? That it’s past its sell-by date? Or that it’s no longer fashionable?

But at least there were no health arguments being used to justify the ban. This was an in-your-face cultural war. The war on smoking and drinking is a cultural war as well. Everything is under attack from these people. Absolutely everything.

The walk-on girls said that their jobs made them feel part of a “family”. They probably didn’t realise that “family” was yet another thing that the likes of Sally Howard want to destroy.

And I couldn’t help but think that Sally Howard was something of a Deborah Arnott clone. She had the same schoolmarmish manner, as if she was teaching 5-year-old children. And her various assertions were accompanied with vigorous you-know-I’m-right nods of the head. She was also dressed in the Arnott style: shades of blood red seem to be the Arnott war colours. She even had matching red ear pendants and lipstick. (Hey, wait, isn’t it demeaning to wear lipstick?)  I somehow felt that in real life she never wore lipstick or earrings or red dresses. That would be too “feminine” for a “feminist”, I’m sure. And she probably didn’t have beehive hair either. The walk-on girls looked comfortable in what they were wearing, but Sally Howard looked like she had been put together from a kit of parts, and someone had told her, “Wear this, and this, and this. And put on some lipstick too. And say that and that and that. And nod vigorously while you’re saying it.” I somehow felt that she’d been on a 3-week course, and coached in what to say, and how to say it. Maybe Arnott herself had even been one of her instructors.

But it was “We don’t cook with lard” that somehow stuck in mind.

About Frank Davis

smoker
This entry was posted in Uncategorized and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink.

36 Responses to Cooking With Lard

  1. All the hipsters cook with lard and dripping and goose fat these days, it’s the trendy thing, so she’s not as modern as she thinks.

    (The reason lard, etc. are back in fashion is because there’s a lot of scientific work coming out that claims that they’re better for you than vegetable oils. It’s also part of the anti-sugar backlash — sugar is out, fat is back in.)

    • Rose says:

      I cook with goose fat, but I also cooked the goose that the jars of goose fat came from. Commercial goose fat just doesn’t have the flavour.

      Apparently the polyunsaturated vegetable oils that became fashionable as a substitute for animal fats just can’t take the heat and create all sorts of nasties, especially if you reuse it.

  2. smokingscot says:

    This’ll piss her off. At motogp races they have brolly dollies for the riders as they hang around for the tv and photographs to be taken. Understandable because those armoured leathers are staggeringly hot.

    However motogp has a couple of female riders – and this one’s got a hunk of a guy there holding the brolly.

    https://mobile.twitter.com/mcams/status/485400036843724800

    That’s the trouble with your very average dried up prune talking about something she only has the most superficial knowledge. They’re there for a first rate reason, very hot suits, designed to be comfortable at high speeds, or to keep the riders, drivers from getting soaked before the race.

    And when it’s wet the brolly people put on jackets.

  3. Timbotoo says:

    Mary Whitehouse reduct. Why are these miserable bastards even given airtime? They just want to suck out any joy they come across.
    Talking about lard, I was in a biscuit factory in Buenos Aires a few years ago. The smell of lard and tallow (which used to be used in the UK industry) hit me like a wall. I was in ecstasy!

    • jaxthefirst says:

      That’s a point. Isn’t the Mary Whitehouse-style tight-lipped, disapproving, attitude – hailing as she does from way back in the 1970s – somewhat, err, “outdated” now?

  4. Rose says:

    She even had matching red ear pendants and lipstick. (Hey, wait, isn’t it demeaning to wear lipstick?) I somehow felt that in real life she never wore lipstick or earrings or red dresses

    I think was trying to dress for the interview as she imagined the walk-on girls would, but nobody wears an evening dress at breakfast time.

  5. Rose says:

    Oh and by the way, I have just listened to the whole of President Trump’s State of the Union speech, which I taped last night.
    So if the BBC, Sky or the Channel4 news try to mislead me today with some carefully edited soundbite, this time, I will know exactly what he said and the context he said it in.

  6. Clicky says:

  7. beobrigitte says:

    Puritan Sally Howard said it was “demeaning”, and wanted Formula One grid girls banned as well. It was, she said, “a social change that we’re seeing.” She also mentioned in passing that she was a “feminist.” The walk-on girls played a “decorative role” and were “making money for men.” She also said that there was a “92% gender pay gap” in the darts world. She also said that “kiss-me-quick, carry-on English culture” was “outdated”, adding that “We don’t cook with lard.”
    First: lard is back in fashion these days.
    Second: Puritan Sally Howard said it was “demeaning”, and wanted Formula One grid girls banned as well. It was, she said, “a social change that we’re seeing.” A social change? These “deep” party girls don’t play a decorative role and are the social change that we’re seeing?
    http://www.eonline.com/shows/kardashians/news/910550/paris-hilton-transforms-into-kim-kardashian-for-yeezy-season-6-campaign

  8. Tony says:

    Formula 1 has capitulated too. I’m not surprised. I stopped watching after they stopped tobacco sponsorship and also turned a once non-pc, edgy and dangerous sport into a monotonous, dull affair.
    http://www.westmonster.com/formula-1-announces-theyll-stop-using-grid-girls/

  9. Roobeedoo2 says:

    ‘NEW DELHI (Reuters) – The Indian government is pushing the Supreme Court to apply a rarely used doctrine that would strip the $11 billion tobacco industry’s legal right to trade, an effort aimed at deterring tobacco companies from challenging tough new regulations.

    ‘New Delhi has for the first time asked the top court to classify tobacco as “res extra commercium”, a Latin phrase meaning “outside commerce,” according to a Reuters review of previously unreported court filing by the Health Ministry on Jan. 8.

    ‘If applied, the doctrine – which harkens back to Roman law – would have far reaching implications: in denying an industry’s legal standing to trade, it gives authorities more leeway to impose restrictions.’

    https://www.reuters.com/article/us-india-tobacco-exclusive/exclusive-with-roman-law-doctrine-india-moves-to-stub-out-tobacco-industry-rights-idUSKBN1FI2SQ?utm_source=34553&utm_medium=partner

    • nisakiman says:

      The tobacco companies should do what they should have done in Australia when the ‘plain’ packaging idiocy was forced on them – just pull out completely and sit back and watch chaos ensue. The loss of the tobacco tax revenue coupled with the immediate burgeoning of the black market and the extra expense that would entail, plus (perhaps, even in Australia) public unrest would perhaps serve to focus the govenment’s mind on the wisdom (or lack of) of their actions.

      • The tobacco companies should do what they should have done in Australia when the ‘plain’ packaging idiocy was forced on them – just pull out completely and sit back and watch chaos ensue.

        Well they didn’t, simply because they*’ve been part and parcel of the whole antismoking charade from the word go (i.e. late 1940’s at the latest). At least that’s what I’ll keep thinking until someone comes up with a better explanation…

        * ‘With ‘they’ referring mostly to the “Majors” involved – and obviously complicit – in the infamous MSA (Philip Morris Inc., R. J. Reynolds, Brown & Williamson and Lorillard – the “original participating manufacturers”, referred to as the “Majors”), not the few remaining cottage industry tobacco producers.

        • Joe L. says:

          Well they didn’t, simply because they’ve been part and parcel of the whole antismoking charade from the word go (i.e. late 1940’s at the latest).

          The more I’ve learned, the more I’ve leaned toward the same belief. I feel it is pretty clear the “Majors” have been complicit for at least the past 15-20 years. When it began is not so clear to me, but if it had anything to do with Nazis/Operation Paperclip (i.e., the late ’40s), I wouldn’t be surprised.

        • Rose says:

          When it began is not so clear to me, but if it had anything to do with Nazis/Operation Paperclip (i.e., the late ’40s), I wouldn’t be surprised

          Well spotted, we had Operation Matchbox and I have wondered…

  10. Clicky says:

    • Smoking Lamp says:

      Despite smoking bans being linked to several prison riots ASH and Company still deny any link, just as they deny any economic impact from smoking bans in pubs and pub closures.

  11. Marvin says:

    My god, you could almost feel the hatred and jealousy from that plain jane towards the two good looking women. And here she is pretending to be their friend, on their side, while trying to put them both out of work. I guess the inadequate plain jane never really had much luck with the boys and has been resentful ever since.

  12. Rose says:

    Formula 1: ‘Grid girls’ will not be used at races this season
    31st Jan 2018
    http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/formula1/42890261

    That was suspiciously quick.

    I’ve watched Formula 1 for years and now the grid has been scoured clean of ladies.
    Are they trying to tell me something?

    • Barry Homan says:

      Maybe the real plan is to substitute the ladies with politically-correct transgender males dressed in drag.

      • nisakiman says:

        I wouldn’t put it past them, Barry. I’ve been an avid F1 fan for decades, but since the diminutive Bernie sold up to the Americans, I’ve worried about the direction it’s taking. The US Gran Prix, with that guy ‘introducing’ the drivers (“Aaand heeeeres LEWWWWWIIIIIISSSSS!!!!!!!”) was absolutely appalling. God forbid that they should make that the norm. I’d seriously reconsider my attachment to F1 if they do.

  13. Yvonne says:

    I was converted to cooking with lard by Churchmouse and my chips have been perfect ever since http://www.churchmousec.wordpress.com/2014/06/30/churchmouses-roasted-chips-100-homemade-fries/
    The more I look into products touted for health the more I question and find that it usually is to do with reverse product than actual health benefits. Sugar – artificial sweeteners, Smoking – nicotine replacements, fat (butter/lard etc) – oils etc
    Unfortunately there are those that take advice from experts on the telly as gospel. A relative landed in hospital, main deficiency was sodium depletion; but, of course, follows advice to cut down on salt despite needing extra salt due to high temperature and sweating.

    • Rose says:

      Yes. Because I don’t like the taste of salty food, I prefer unsalted butter and gave up eating crisps in the 60’s because they just tasted horribly salty, I am aware that my salt levels must be perilously low, So now I take a few grains of salt in the palm of my hand when I remember. If you need it, it tastes delicious, when you’ve had enough it tastes revolting.

    • Frank Davis says:

      I just remembered my mother cooking with lard. And making pastry with lard. I was working from memory.

  14. waltc says:

    What if a lot of people flooded the organizers of Formula 1 with protests against the no-girls move and catcalls about their henpecked caving to PC? Of course they may care more about cockeyed virtue signalling than the opinions or even the attendance of their customers, like our NFL which has taken big financial hits but continue to back the players who irrelevantly kneel during the (also irrelevant) national anthem.

    On the topic of Social Change, on Wednesday nite, Tucker Carlson on Fox, did an opening riff on its sweeping destructiveness and aptly called it Nihilism– a concept that hadn’t occurred to me to apply but that instantly seemed stunningly apt.

  15. Pingback: Grid Girl Gone | Frank Davis

No need to log in

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.