How Do You Hold Your Cigarette?

Via Hampy Hamp (aka Pat Nurse?) on Facebook:


I’ve seen people smoking like in D and E, but I’d always interpreted it to mean that they were either trying to keep the cigarette hidden or protected from wind or rain.

I had to light a cigarette and see what I did with it before I could answer.

I found that I held it in a variety of ways. When drawing on it, it would be held between the index and middle finger a bit like F. When just holding it in the air between puffs, I held the cigarette between thumb and middle finger, a bit like B but reversed. And when typing or drinking from a mug, the cigarette was wedged firmly between index and middle finger, as in A.

Anyway, to save you the trouble of actually doing the online test, the psychological significances were given as:

A intellectual, very brainy type, a contemplative character.
B unreliable, weak, hard to live with, and inclined to excessive lying.
C Very tense , direct, straight-forward, inclined towards stubbornness.
D A hail fellow, well-met character who enjoys high living. Texas millionaire type.
E daring, calculating, literally likes to “play with fire.”
F dreamer, always off on a tangent.
G Very pessimistic, excessive in business caution.

Believe that and you’ll believe anything.

And if smoking bans tear communities apart, so do windmills:

Wind turbines tear apart communities and relationships, causing animosity that lingers for years, warn farmers who have lived through the ugly battles…

“There are people here that have absolute hatred for others. I have never seen anything so divisive in our community ever, in my entire life,” said Alma-area dairy farmer Tim Martin. “You try to say forgive and forget, but a lot of people say ‘we forgive them but we remember.’ They put their pocketbook ahead of our health and above the community’s well-being, and people don’t forget that….”

“My in-laws are Dutch and some of them are quite old,” Martin said. “They liken this to the war. They say through the war there were families that helped the (Nazis), and people never looked at them the same. Those people who supported the turbines are never going to be looked at the same.”



About Frank Davis

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18 Responses to How Do You Hold Your Cigarette?

  1. Joe L. says:

    I’m normally somewhere between F and G, with the occasional D when needing to protect my cigarette from the elements, as you mentioned, Frank. I guess that means I’m normally lost in a pessimistic daydream, but I live the high life during inclement weather! :-/

  2. Tony says:

    I heard that cigarette holding was more a class issue. With working class people habitually hiding the, typically forbidden at work, burning tip in their cupped hand wereas middle class people, doing desk bound jobs, felt no need to hide.

    The psychologist’s claim is nonsense in any case though.

    It seems psychology is infested with pseudo-scientific clap trap of this sort. Here’s an article by a psychologist who appears to have just woken up to it. Astonishingly, it seems his contemporaries actually believe they are ‘doing science’. The sad part is that he seems to believe that his profession can be reformed.
    The full article:

    I admit I couldn’t face reading to the end. I’ve grown intolerant of idiocy. Perhaps I’m being too harsh but I doubt it.

    • Roobeedoo2 says:

      P-Hacking sounds familiar.

    • Frank Davis says:

      From the gwpf link:

      But beyond the demise of the theory, for Inzlicht the results represent something greater, and sadder. He’s worked on ego depletion for most of a decade. His studies have been published in top journals. “I’m in a dark place,” he writes in a recent blog post. “Have I been chasing puffs of smoke for all these years?”

      Same question must occasionally occur to antismoking zealots, I’d guess.

  3. Some French bloke says:

    B unreliable, weak, hard to live with, and inclined to excessive lying.

    Isn’t that the perfect description of a typical anti-smoking zealot? Probably that’s what they do when smoking “on the sly”.

    E daring, calculating, literally likes to “play with fire.

    How more (oxy)moronic can one get?
    To dare, one has got to stop “calculating”. As you say Frank, “Believe that and you’ll believe anything.”

  4. waltc says:

    A, G, and D when outdoors in the wind. I wonder tho how I got to be a millionaire what for being so excessively cautious, and why, since I’m so rich, I’m still a pessimist. Perhaps my intellectual contemplative brain can figure this out

  5. Joe L. says:

    The situation continues to worsen here in Chicago. The legal age to buy tobacco just rose to 21, taxes on tobacco are being hiked yet again (already highest in the country), and the city also banned chewing tobacco at all sporting events. I can’t see myself living here much longer.

    Age to Buy Tobacco Products Increased to 21 in Chicago

    • Harleyrider1978 says:

      Ya the black market just tripled in Chicago you can bet and the city council was obviously waiting for a bigger federal bribe before they’d pass the mayors nazi legislation.

  6. Lepercolonist says:

    I could not wait to turn 18 and be considered an adult. At which time the courts considered us as adults. I could be a helicopter pilot or nuclear sub crewman in the military. We can marry and raise children, vote in the elections, etc. However, too immature to buy a pack of cigarettes ? These politicians make me sick to my stomach.

  7. Cecily Collingridge says:

    How I held my cigarette changed radically when I switched to roll-ups and I adopted a holder to stop them staining my fingers. A whole new world of expression opened up. In conversation, I sometimes hold it palm down between my thumb and two fingers and wave it round like a conductor’s baton. Alternatively, I twist my wrist, so the palm is up, to adopt a listening pose (the height dependent on how superior I want to feel) or stab the air like a fencer to emphasize a point. Sometimes outside, when alone and thinking, I toy with it, twirling it from one finger to the next (like some people can do with a coin) but I’m not very good at it. I’m considering getting a much longer holder.
    Goodness knows what psychologists would make of this.

  8. prog says:

    “Say you’re caught by Gestapo*,” he says. Engage the weapon and “there’s a deafening noise in a confined space—disorder, confusion. Remember, any chance you might escape is better than no chance.”

    *(and threatened with an £80 fine for flouting the smoking ban)

    Quite like the edible explosive bread idea…

  9. Pat Nurse says:

    They used to advise “Ladies” how to hold their cigarette – between two fingers, with the cigarette pointing upwards because then the smoke rises and does not leave the yellow nicotine residue on the fingers. This is the same reason they used cigarette holders. There was method in their madness until we all became tarred as dirty filthy smokers who just have to look at a cigarette to become nicotine stained etc etc .

    • beobrigitte says:

      There was method in their madness until we all became tarred as dirty filthy smokers who just have to look at a cigarette to become nicotine stained etc etc .

      …. and the DIRTY, FILTHY smokers huddle in dark corners, hiding their DIRTY, FILTHY habit.
      The anti-smokers sure give the impression of not being the sharpest tools in the box. We all have heard this too many times to pay attention.

      Debbie Arnot must be opening a bottle of water to celebrate:

      Deborah Arnott, Chief Executive of health charity ASH said:

      “While public health is facing funding cuts the tobacco industry continues to reap huge profits from a product that kills around 100,000 people every year in the UK. It’s time the peddlers of death and disease were made to pay for the harm they cause. The Chancellor has acknowledged that it is ‘fair to ask the tobacco industry to make a greater contribution’ but he is yet to turn words into action.”

      Tobacco kills 100,000 people every year? REALLY??? The peddlers of death and disease? REALLY???
      Only someone with obvious limits can spout such nonsense. One would laugh about it were it not for the obviously and equally as limited politicians running countries.
      At the same time we are being told that WE ALL LIVE LONGER (that does include us older smokers, btw!) SO PEOPLE WILL HAVE TO WORK LONGER.
      PR Debbie has some explaining to do. Alongside the politicians.

      As from last night tobacco has become more expensive. And there is talk of dishing out tobacco tax on e-liquid. Looking forward to the boom of “free traders” in our area and envy the ones who can hop on a boat to cross the Channel for a day to shop.

  10. beobrigitte says:

    Mostly G but occasionally E (cigarette the opposite way round).

    Nevertheless, the psychological significances may not apply – it says: The way a man holds his cigarette…. :)

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