I thought this was a spoof when I first read it: Sunday Post (my added emphases).
THIS will leave you in a spin – Government chiefs are weighing up a “bonkers” plan to ban domestic washing machines.
Proposals set out by the Scottish Government could also see people forced to give up energy-gobbling white goods such as spin-dryers and dishwashers.
In a Scottish Government proposal entitled ‘Making Things Last’, mandarins argue people should “move away from product ownership” and “rather than actually owning appliances”, they should use washing machine and dishwasher providers to pay “per wash”.
Green types claim centralised launderettes using super-efficient washers would help the environment, especially as the average household does almost 400 loads of laundry each year, consuming about 13,500 gallons of water.
But the plans, set out in a baffling consultation document which was published last week, have been branded a “suddy outrage” by people fed up with a claimed Scottish Government “nanny state”.
Scottish Conservative MSP Alex Johnstone slammed the proposals and said: “It’s bad enough the Scottish Government wants to appoint every child a state guardian and tell landowners what to do with their land.
“Now it seems the Big Brother mentality is creeping into how people wash their clothes and secure toys for their children.
I don’t know what ‘suddy’ means. But I do know what ‘forced’ means.
From Hampy Hamp (aka Pat Nurse?) on Facebook (my added emphases):
FYI – I had a letter this week from UK public health minister Jane Ellison (written by one of the ASH political lobbyists installed in the DoH) who confirmed that the Govt does intend to force everyone in the UK to quit smoking by any means and does not rule out criminalisation and discrimination as a means to achieve this. The Minister said people who enjoy smoking and have smoked a lifetime don’t matter. The sooner they die or quit the better. She only cares about people who don’t smoke. I won’t be voting Conservative, Labour or LibDem again as all those parties hate us and feel they have a right to bully us into living their way of life. #MyLifeMyChoice #GovtDoesNotOwnMyBody However, that said, she is too much of a coward to do it herself and so has given the power of persecution to local councils full of either thick morons or prejudicial bigots like our very own pRick Metcalfe and Karen Lee – both are dangerous smokerphobics.
I haven’t seen the letter. Maybe Pat Nurse has published it somewhere. But once again, I understand what the word ‘force’ means.
What is it about these people that they feel it is necessary to force people to do things. I suppose it must be because they think they won’t do them otherwise.
It’s actually perfectly possible that people might choose of their own accord to use ‘centralised launderettes using super-efficient washers’. If somebody offered me a service whereby I could have dirty clothes collected, washed, dried, ironed, and returned next morning, all for a modest price (made possible by the super-efficent washers), I’d happily dispense with my washing machine. Same with my dirty dishes.
But rather than allow the market to supply such services, these people have decided that they’re going to force people to use such services, which almost certainly will mean that you’ll have to carry your dirty clothes to the centralised launderettes 5 miles away, where they’ll all be boiled in filthy water that makes them even dirtier, and returned as un-ironed rags three weeks later (if they are returned at all).
But then, they’re not interested in what people want. They’re concerned about the environment. Maybe even Gaia. That’s what matters to them.
I think that all these mad utopian schemes – and they are all completely barking mad – will result in an economic and political disintegration in which the government tax income that is currently funding all these harebrained schemes completely dries up, and all these demented utopian planners in government and universities and quangos lose their jobs because there’s no money left to pay them. And there will be no money available for the washing machine law enforcement agencies either. They’ll all be fired.
And when they’ve all gone, people will dig up the washing machines and the stashes of tobacco and sugar and salt they hid or buried at the height of The Madness, and sit contentedly smoking in front of the little spinning machines (if there’s still any electricity to power them).
The utopian programmes, imposed by force, will all fail, of course. They always do. They will result in poverty, hardship, and most likely starvation and death. But why wait for this to happen? Why not simply pre-emptively fire all these batshit-crazy, authoritarian dreamers right now, and save ourselves a great deal of trouble?